Epic Badassery: Stabbed a Dracula with a Building

By Unknown on Saturday, July 21, 2012





Vampires. These days that word tends to evoke thoughts of glitter, bad acting, wild hair, and existential crises, but before Robert Pattinson shimmered his way into Kristen Stewarts pants and the realm of pop culture vampires were a creature to be feared. They were dark and mysterious beings that fed on the blood of humans. They were something to be intrigued by, but always something that needed to be killed, preferably via a stake through the heart. And while vampires are pretty much ruined for movies, True Blood, and movies, Twilight, they have remained relatively untouched in gaming, thankfully. You see gamers get it, vampires just straight up need to be killed. There's a whole series based on that premise. I am, of course, talking about Castlevania.

Castlevania, as you probably know, is about the eternal struggle between the vampire-hunter family the Belmonts and Dracula. Nearly each game ends with you killing Dracula, typically by whipping him in the face and dick. However, one Belmont apparently thought genital whippings were beneath him and decided to step up his game. That brings me to the focus of this first installment of Epic Badassery: Gabriel Belmont.

Gabriel doesn't just kill a vampire in Castlevania: Lords of Shadow, no he gets brutal with his killings and none more so than his encounter with Carmilla, queen of the vampires. Check out the video below to see how he ends her.



HE FUCKING STABBED THAT DRACULA BITCH WITH A BUILDING! WITH A FUCKING BUILDING! What kind of a monster man is he? He pulled a flying bat, at least 300lbs, from the sky down unto a building and then he kept pulling and BROKE THE FUCKING BUILDING! Gabriel Belmont, you sir are one epic badass and I cannot wait to see the crazy shit that'll go down in Lords of Shadow 2.

Source: Castlevania: Lords of Shadow
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